I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Just ate Panda Express. Fortune cookie had no fortune in it. I actually prefer this. Less broken dream potential.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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