Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
23 People Reveal The Worst Culture Shock They’ve Ever Experienced While Traveling
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
I told him it was alright.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.