shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
ugly people sure do ruin things
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
"I wonder if vinegar is some sort of magical hangover cure" "...no I was definitely still drunk and drinking vinegar because I was thirsty"
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Randomize
