Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
You dont lie about slip and slides
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't seen her in ages, how is she?
Well I woke up next to her this morning so I guess I would say she could be doing better
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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