Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
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