I smelled like jager and penis. The only cure was a pack of camels and plan b.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
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