You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
When we get drunk one of us ends up running off and fucking someone in an inappropriate place, like the roof of the restaurant, or Greece, while the other convinces people not to worry and not to go looking. That good sir is a real mother fucking friendship.
Thats what I'm talking about
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
