Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
Randomize
