he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
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Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
It was crazy man, at one point after already going 3 rounds I tried to breakaway for a smoke...she yanked me by the nipple hair back on top of her.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
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