Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Randomize
