My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I was so hungover I threw up on her when she answered the door. i don't think it was a good first impression
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
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I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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