i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
Only Jon could get an entire commuter train to chant "Ride! Jon! Home!" to get a girl in bed.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Randomize
