Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize
