He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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