This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
