# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
I just said "I love my cat" as a hobby.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
