wanna go halves on a baby?
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
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