the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
your fridge is broken, your sock drawer is full of snow, and you flipped off the whole stadium on the big screen. I'd say it went well.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
