Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
You'll never fully grasp an awkward walk of shame until you run into his mom while you're trying to sneak out. Then to make matters worse you have to ask her to mover car because it's blocking you in.
and I lost my effing shirt.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Randomize
