Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
pop tarts are not kleenex
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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