I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
You should seriously consider super glueing your knees together
The power of my vagina can withstand any attempt of celibacy
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
