if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I feel like my stoner spirit animal is Janice from the muppets.
She bit my shoulder during foreplay last night, and it's already infected. I think she has rabies.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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