i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
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