Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
you told him to eat candy out of your ear instead of your vagina because you had your period. never. drink. AGAIN.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
You are a genius and a whore.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize