in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
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