it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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