Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
I figured working in my office on the 34th floor I'd be safe railing xanax off my desk. Of course, I snort it just in time for the window washer guy to give me a thumbs up.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
