Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
