it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
The air taste purple.
Randomize
