JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I want Jason Statham to talk British to my vagina.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize