Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
My penis needs a shock collar
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
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