Cold hands, warm shart.
Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I licked your asshole in confidence.
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