pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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