Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
Randomize
