yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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