i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Taco trucks are like ice cream trucks for drunk adults. They should have a mariachi tune they play super loud to bring people out of the bars for tacos.
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Randomize