So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
i feel as if its time to shave my pubes but i should wait until before the party. nobody likes a sloppy drunk girl with a stubble-crotch.
story of my life.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Between falling off a shelf on to a concrete floor and sex with you - i may never walk again.
Randomize
