Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
I'm sorry, that really sucks. I'm in the bath eating lasagna and if anyone comes in here it's going to be bad news for them
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... π―πππ
Do I even want to know?
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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