You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
just woke up in a hotel room.. realizing its the hotel i work at.. lets see how this walk of shame turns out
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
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