If you're gonna cry pregnant again I'm not coming over.
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
I apparently sent an offer letter to, and then subsequently onboarded, the wrong candidate. How's your Monday?
Randomize
