grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
Oh, I'm just lighting tennis balls and WD-40 on fire, what are YOUUU doing?!
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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