i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
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