Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
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