Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
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