Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
i've created a new STD.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
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