remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
when i was ordering pizza, the guy muffled the phone but i could clearly hear him say "its that drunk bitch again"
I'm more picky about my flip flops than the guys I sleep with
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
That tingly feeling you're experiencing in your lady parts is my mustache. All the ladies of America are waking up feeling the same thing. You're welcome.
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.