girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
That's an oxymoron.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
This Girl Got Ghosted By Her BF Of 5 Years While On A Trip They Took For Her Birthday
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
People Are Applauding Chrissy Teigen For Getting Candid About Breast-Pumping
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.