the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"