she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
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