fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
the fact that my dorm room overlooks a children's daycare is enough initiative for me to have safe sex.
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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