I'm pants shitting drunk right now
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
He smacked my ass so hard my ass cheek looks like Wilson from Cast Away
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
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