it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
whose parrot is this?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
