my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
No... No really he actually thought the condom was meant for his hand...
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
Randomize
